i can't understand, i need to now, but how could i ever begin? i am not them. i have not reached the stubborn ignorance in life where i sit still and wilfully try to stop learning and accepting other's beliefs and it makes me rage and hurt inside that they won't even try, while i take the simple time to address their points and see through their eyes and feel through their hands but i simply can't understand.
i scream and curse and shout but it leaves me with nothing but doubt; i doubt the world with every difference, should we all just come together? it could never happen, ever. or could it? no, no the opinions are too different and the distances are too great for such opposing sides to see anything but the other's hate. the titles and names are to blame for this hateful relationship; this torn society of what used to be love and peace; full of internet sites ranting their hate to release what they feel upon others and do it with pride, but what they don't see is it from my eyes. poorly worded statments and thoughts, they have forgot that not everyone is them in the world, and i know everyone is not me. the lives we live and carry on vary so differently.
and that makes me cry myself to sleep. the fact that these opinions will never meet. they'll never cross no matter how many lives lost or followers gained, there will still always be pain. the stubborn beliefs of both sides coincide and agree on the fact that they'll never turn their back or their cheeks the other way to look away from each other's actions and beliefs.
but their rage, oh i can't even begin to wonder how they hold their other emotions under. how they'd rather curse and call names than turn away and love who they want, disregarding what they were taught. maybe that's it, it's a locke and the key to why they feel the way they were told to be. generations and generations back, can't i travel and unravel why these people are so split? why they must be so different? why they hate so much and why it has to be this way, instead of just leaving each other alone today.
maybe i'm biased, looking at this view from my eyes only, but that's all i see. i can't be someone i'm not, i can't adopt thoughts that i don't believe in; could i just be talking to myself? should i just shelf all these feelings and store them away for fear of being called out or hated today? or maybe on the flip-side i am loved for defending what i believe, i could be called a hero; someone to reprieve and revive a long hiding virus in a collective amount where it'll eat into their hearts and fall out of their mouth in forms of words and praise or curses and hate; whichever will make its way over, i will carry on my shoulder.
and maybe my hate is just, like they justify theirs too, with knowledge and verses and pathetic curses. am i really just trying to see the bad in everything i've seen? i think there's only worse to see from something to detrimentally dangerous to a tabula rasa. there are things i can say that could make you go away but it wouldn't be a win or a loss and it'd envoke passions and hurt feelings, you'd tell me i was here with bad dealings and intentions possibly. and if you mentioned a snide remark, it would probably spark the start of WWIII.
but god am i being just like them? as ignorant and selfish? i'm trying and i promise that i'm not trying to wish and force what i think on the next person, or you for that matter. i'm just trying to get a little higher on the intelligence ladder. but i'm yelling again, it's inside my head, and my eyes are blurry with tears as i leak my emotions out for the next generation that has to continue with this hit-bullshit sensation. but it's still so full of hate. and the realization is everything i can't take.
i am them, they are me. we just see things differently. my hate burns, theirs does too, but there's nothing either of us can do, to make the other see what we try to let free: the opinions that one up the other. but i can't comprehend, i bet they don't understand: